Before I jump right in to today’s RANT: I hope you like the new look, and I added my social media to the right side – for those interested. I wanted to give my blog a more personal touch as I’m getting closer to the show (3.5 weeks), and I have a lot of big things happening in my life…so stay tuned!
So here I go…again. The thing about the fitness industry is that everyone is a critic, but rightfully so. Whether it’s to attain a certain aesthetic or to achieve a certain goal, your body is going to change, and someone is going to be right there to compliment and criticize you. There’s a reason we hire coaches and trainers and dietitians – to professionally and tactfully critique our plans. If you are not educated in the field, or an athlete yourself, then your comments will probably end up being more hurtful than helpful.
Nothing irks my nerves quite like a woman referring to another woman as “too masculine,” or making light of her hard work and effort just to belittle her decision to have muscles of any shape and size. People fail to understand the hard work, the time, the money, the dedication…the blood, sweat and tears (because that’s EXACTLY what it is) that goes into the makings of a great physique. When you tear someone down by saying, “Ew, she looks like a man,” or “Real women have curves,” you’re not really seeing that person for who they truly are. And who put the stigma on women that we must have fatty-curves? Or that we couldn’t have the muscular definition of a bicep? And who are you to say that a woman is too “bulky?” Better yet, what would you think of me if I bullied an overweight woman? Wouldn’t it be fair for me to call someone fat, or to even to simply say, “She could stand to lose a few.” Opinions are like assholes…If ‘curves’ make you happy, then I’m happy for you.
Of course, over time I’ve developed a thicker skin, probably due to those bulging muscles protecting my soft, delicate, feminine heart, and those comments don’t really hurt me personally; I’ve learned to view them as a sign of insecurity. When I see other people criticize Dana Lynn Bailey for strong delts, thick quads, and muscular abdominals, I think to myself, “Have you nothing better to do with your time?” Because while you sit their and insult her hard work and dedication to something SHE enjoys (which she probably does without giving any thought to you), what are you doing? Oh yeah, sitting there. Get a hobby.
In theory, it’s really the same as someone insulting the outfit you chose to wear, the color or your hair, or the style of your make-up — unnecessary and hurtful.
My boyfriend recently decided to share his 3 month progress with the world and someone had to audacity to respond, “A bit too much for my taste.”
Well lady, let me tell you, he didn’t bravely share his photo just for your opinion, nor did he shed all that fat and build all that muscle for you, so sit down. Bodybuilding is a selfish sport – it is greedy and narcissistic in a sense. I’ve spent the last 8 months tearing my body apart. I have lost over 25 pounds of fat and built up who knows how much muscle, but there are days that I get up and don’t want to leave the house because I am ashamed of my body and it’s lack of progress. There are days that I get little sleep and my body is retaining water and I feel fat and bloated. There are days that I don’t want to go workout, that I’m tired of eating clean, that I want to go out and have a few beers with my friends – but it’s a process, and I have dedicated myself to it and I’m going to see it through. With that being said, I am more hard on myself than anyone ever could be, so the last thing I need is someone telling me that I’m “too muscular,” or as my mother so eloquently put it, “losing my sweet femininity.” Like I said, it’s a process – We bust our ass for this process and you don’t have to like it, but the least you can do is respect it.
“If you have nothing nice to say, then say nothing at all.”